Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Baby Sabin #2 is now 17 Weeks Old

Well, technically, the baby is 15 weeks old, and I am 17 weeks pregnant... and that is not "Jennifer Math."

Remember last week when I shared my excitement about feeling the creature inside of me move?

The baby continued moving like that every night. It is so comforting to feel that and know our baby is doing well. Then on Saturday night I didn't feel the somersaults from the previous week. And of course, like any good pregnant woman, I got worried.

Bruce prayed for me and the baby. I prayed for me and the baby. But I didn't feel anything. After a little while, I thought I felt something, but it was too late, I was already in full-worry mode. Eventually, I had to take a breath (because you know, if you hold your breath it is easier to feel the baby!) and soon I fell asleep exhausted from the worry.

It didn't last long and I woke up at 3:45 just positive something was wrong. I even imagined that I felt a couple of contractions. Sleep was elusive. Eventually, I got up to use the bathroom (this would have happened any way folks, my bladder isn't as spacious as it used to be). There was no spotting or anything and I didn't have any real cramps, so I prayed a while longer and asked God for sleep.

It wasn't until Monday night that I started to feel the tumbling baby a little more strongly. That little bit of movement was such a relief to me. My new blog friend, Kim, posted this about that time:
I quote Sheila Walsh, "We are fragile human beings who wrestle with doubt. We are daily confronted by our own frailty and yet we are so embraced by Christ that His love transforms our lives. The struggles of testing shed light on our inconsistencies. It is one thing to think that you are doing everything right and that is why God is smiling on you, but it is a life transforming moment when, just as you realize you have got it all wrong, Christ receives you anyhow.
 I can't begin to describe the breadth of emotions I went through between Saturday and Monday night. I wondered if God was going to take our baby because of a recent decision. Or if this was going to be punishment for some hidden sign. I could say aloud that I know God would have a purpose for taking the baby, but I had no idea what it would possibly be. And I was wrestling with being angry and hurt about it too.

Yes, I have an over-active imagination. Just ask my mom.

So yeah, I found some inconsistencies in my thought life this weekend. I am going to be working on those, because I want this baby to see a real life lived for God modeled in me.

(Photo of 17-week of baby, in utero, courtesy of BabyCenter.com)

4 comments:

  1. Oh Jennifer...I know how you feel. I lost four babies inbetween James and Elisabeth. I worried constantly. Plus...Elisabeth never ever hardly moved. I was not as close to the Lord back then as I am now...or maybe I could have rested in His grace.

    I am so thankful this quote helped someone besides me! I am praying for this baby.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Glad your baby is all right. I remember worrying about whether or not my babies were moving at all or moving enough...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Relax, don't create problems where there aren't any. Enjoy your pregnancy.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am so grateful and thankful that all turned out well and that Baby Sabin #2 is now moving around...I totally know what that whole experience is like and would never wish it on anyone.

    It would be nice to be in on the extra prayers when you need them you know...after all, I am your mom.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting! Be sure to leave an email address in your profile or in your comment if you'd like a reply.